Sat in the Dove Pub with a pint of Guinness for me and a G and T for Pat and a half pint pot of pork scratchings between us on Tuesday evening at our favourite table.Bliss. I missed out on the local pub scene when growing up. I was doing homework then getting to bed early to be ready for a 6am practice on the ice or I would be on late night ice. So what for some are the normal things of life can be just fine for me. Here was such a moment.

Pat was interested in how I was doing and how I was going to take the next steps in, and from, my Year of Learning? Good questions. I don’t have all the answers. Funny how in the past I would have tried to justify things but the truth is, I have direction and purpose but not detailed specific answers… yet. Whilst this is scary to not be 100% sure of the future (where’s the security on this?) strangely it feels mostly OK… for now.

I do have gut instincts that Christiane encourages me to pursue. I’ve had these in the past. A gestalt (holistic view on things), like buy Apple shares when they were 99p for example, take my money out of the stock market before the crash etc etc – neither of which I did! So now I am listening to ‘my gut instincts’ more, and acting on them.

What strikes me most is that my journey has taken a turn to be a lot about developing my character. Do you have the bottle Slater to go out and deliver what you have dreamed is possible, what you have taken a year out to pursue and invested over three years in building a studio to facilitate? When you have learnt are you going to show me what you have done and not be fazed by being berated or feted? When will this be? Do you have the bottle to see things through and not hide out? Big questions. I avoid the deadline ones all the time. The danger of working to your own pace. So I will never have to be fully ready then? There is the danger of hiding out in this…

I sit this afternoon with a tired body and mind; three days of intensive gym work and out each evening with full on days and my body is saying take a break, my mind is saying, take a break. So I am, talking to you, taking a break.

My gut is telling me that in the past I have spent a lot of time producing ideas and projects but have not really dared to give my all to being the artist, being exposed – as it were – in that role. As such I have not ‘really’ worked my butt off to become as good as I could be. So now – my gut feeling is saying – spend the majority of your time developing your skills because, as I always knew throughout my skating career, ‘Talent Will Out.” Once you are there you will need bottle to step out and sell it! Another step.

So Pat, as I said, I want to be spending all my working hours on voice, guitar, keyboards and music production – later this can come together with other things I can already do… so that’s the focus for the last one hundred days of this year. Then to look at a move into learning / production. I don’t think I will ever stop learning, I love it. Other things are comig up though that get in the way of a ‘clean 100 days’ – I am already consiering entrepreneurially extending my 365 day year…

I am hard wired to be producing something but I am absolutely loving learning. Songwriting is a beautiful craft and writing from guitar, keyboards, lyrics first of voice gives different palettes on which to draw. Singing is challenging for me. It is like being an athlete requiring fitness, focus, power and control along with emotion and skill. Music is so rich across the genres too – I am loving all aspects of songwriting and performance here as well as the technical.

Where will this lead? How will it pay the bills? Exactly what are you doing? I cannot answer these questions… exactly… yet. I can answer that for me to dare to take time to develop my God given talents lights up my soul and gives me purpose. I can answer that character is key to the journey for me and surprisingly my learning is creating a difference deep within that is both amazing and unexpected.

In the Parable of the Sower – a bible story – money  as in Talents, a currency of olden times, was given to various servants and left with them by the master who went away for a while. When he returned each servant had increased the wealth except for one who had buried what he was given (so he lost against inflation as well as not getting interest from the bank). This last servant paid a heavy price for his attitude, fear and ineptitude. It strikes me that we all have talents and to use them to their best advantage playing full out will gain a reward on that investment.

My challenge has always been in not knowing how to ‘really’ apply ‘my core talents’ and in not having had the bottle to fully go for it in the past. I’ve been like the inept servant burying things and hiding out. I feel like it’s time to make a change to that. More than a mid life crisis then? I think so. More like an awakening.

So ‘How’s the Journey going?’ It’s going, thank you, I’m on the road to somewhere.  It’s a lot better than being stuck. I am working out like a Spartan in the gym, enjoying my friends and life with my wife and son. I am  learning and writing and …. Eat, drink and enjoy life – it says in the bible – everything else is just a chasing after wind. A guy called Solomon penned that…

I am doing that along the way! How brilliant… and yes, if we had the time I could tell you of  my vision that I am playing into. It will come. Maybe another time.

Pat was slightly dissappointed at one thing though. I am so over myself around the celebrity thing that our double act that draws on the comedic premise of Slater loosing his fame has lost its edge. It’s all good.

I hope you too are enjoying your life’s journey.

Love N

PS Photo is from our trip in April to Canada – road from Calgary down to Kelowna, Christiane took it.

  • tease-and-stocking

  • tease-and-denial

  • sissification

  • my-princess-goddess

  • mesmerize

  • jerkoff-instruction

  • humiliation

  • handjob

  • foot-fetish

  • female-domination

  • dirty-talk

  • cum-eating-instruction

  • chastity

  • ass-worship