On the street corner where I live is an Italian Pizza Shop/Restaurant owned by Charlie – who never ever looks stressed and walks slow. Giovani, an Italian who used to have his own Italian Restaurant (in Italy of course) is Chef. Over the last six years I have said hello to Giovani on many days as he is part of our comunity and we have had a coffee together on occasions. He makes great pizzas and Wednesday I had Carbonara which I love sat out in the sunshine. He strikes me as a man who has seen a lot of the world and now works for his family who are back in Italy as work is easier to get here.

Giovani’s catch phrase is SLOWLY SLOW SLOWLY SLOW…

Well I find myself under pressure from different quarters as I reflect on that phrase. It has been a long time since I started my musical journey and as yet nothing has come out to be produced. What is going on…? Why am I not sharing stuff? Are you all talk and no substance? Hmmm…

There are many answers and some may occur as and are excuses… Some reasons are also embedded in daring to take on a ‘so many’ – ‘too many?’ new challenge that has scary elements to it for me and so much to learn allied to a degree of perfectionism that is not the greatest asset to ‘Releasing’ product… And yet the challenge also has joy and and so much more within it for me. It IS character building if nothing else – but character doesn’t pay the bills…


And yet I keep on keeping on. The lyrics come, the songs develop and there is something magical in all of this. Projects are in development and will see life… one day. And… in that journey I find enjoyment – in the daily challenge of how to produce a lot – that currently results in nothing at all being produced I have purpose. Purpose I did not have for so many years of my life. It’s a stretch, uncomfortable, frustrating and yet – the vision I set over six years ago that lives on posters on the walls of my studio is pursued it. So at least I am persistent! I was told FAILURE CAN’T LIVE WITH PERSISTENCE… by my friend Karl. So something is happening… Perhaps it’s not output but there is sure a lot of input being created.

So I’m off to Music Therapy today at the Treehouse here in Ipswich. A service to help us as a family after Jon Freddy died that is opening up all sorts of things for us. And on this journey some things around me move forward with hope and some are in meltdown and I miss deadlines – again… That’s ‘my’ life right now I guess.

And overall – Keep on Keeping on…  Keep on believing there is something here of value… ‘It’s exciting’ said someone when I shared a little the other day. Indeed, excepting to people who have had to live with the owner of the dream and are fed up with it now. Me not being one of those folk but feeling a bit embattled and embarrassed by and to those that fit that category.

Come from nothing they used to say at Landmark. And indeed my Bible says – Forgetting all that is past, move forward towards the goal (I paraphrase…)

So onwards… and upwards… and whilst I appear to the outside world to be SLOWLY SLOW –  industry is occurring and I can’t help but think somehow, this approach – right now – is valid. Time will tell…

And I read this today from Anna Vital –  – interesting insights and great visuals ….

Have a good day.

Love Nicky


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